Prime News Ghana

Ellen Mimi Owusu writes: The little Things

By Ellen Mimi Owusu
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The whole world watched on as Prince Harry and Meghan Markle got married on the 19th of May 2018 in Windsor. The wedding was reported to have been viewed by over 2 billion people around the world.

My family and I decided to watch the wedding on TV that day even though we were tempted to go the venue as we reside in Windsor. The whole world talked about this fairy-tale marriage for weeks. Some people wished them well, while others believed the marriage will not last! What makes a marriage work? Whether it is a Royal, celebrity or “normal” union. I reckon so many factors contribute to the success of any marriage such as respect, compromise, care and trust. However, not doing the little things can send a marriage straight to the divorce avenue.

Having a beautiful wedding is nice, however for a marriage to work it will depend on how you treat each other when no one is looking. What are these little things? It is about the random texts you send each other whiles both of you are apart just to check on each other. It really melts my heart when my husband sends me a text during office hours, because for a moment even in his busy schedule I know he is thinking of me.

 As the years go by most married couple stop doing the little things they did whiles dating such as texting each other all time to say I love, how is your day, I miss you, can’t wait to see you etc. These words are magical and can brighten one’s day.

A little gesture as taking care of your spouse when he or she has a headache or flu is important and should not be taken for granted. Simple acts like giving your spouse something warm to drink, offering a message will make your spouse feel loved and recover quickly.

 A tip here men, don’t let the household chores pile up when your wife is unwell! By taking over and making sure the house is clean makes her fall in love with you all over again! And ladies be there for your husbands as well when they are unwell.

Wives, do you compliment your husbands on their looks? Giving compliments should not only be done by the man. Compliment his haircut, his new clothes, Say something nice! And when your wife dresses up to go to out, compliment her looks, is your duty as a husband to do that, not her friends or colleagues.

Studies show compliments can lift one’s mood and cause people to perform better. Scientists explain compliments activate the region of the brain called striatum (as cash does) and encourage people to perform better. Therefore, complimenting your wife for that delicious meal and saying thank you to your husband for cutting the grass will go a long way to encourage them to do more.

Have time and listen to each other when your partner is talking to you, pause that TV programme, put that phone down, Facebook and Instagram can wait, give your spouse your undivided attention! Give proper eye contact and show interest in what they are saying.

Ask each other how one’s day was. Do not settle for “it was ok” response, probe further, this will show you care.

Yes, is good to sometimes go out and have fun together however you can always watch a movie or a tv programme together at home, is an inexpensive and excellent way to bond with your spouse at home. Cuddling together when watching that movie or TV programme will bring you so close together. Helping your wife out when she has not asked you especially in the kitchen, is a little thing but very important. I always tell me, husband, a clean sink makes me happy! It took a while, but he got it now, he makes the effort to help wash up all the time (though sometimes I must give him a little nudge!)

Be kind and always say nice things to each other, “we need to talk” should not always be about blame or a problem, it can be just about praising your spouse. When was the last time you said something kind and nice to your spouse? Do not wait for Mother’s Day or Father’s Day to tell each other how much you appreciate them, do not wait for your wedding anniversary to express to spouse how you love them and how blessed to have them in your life.

 Make every day a Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and a wedding anniversary. Get that little gift for your spouse out of the blue, if you do not have the means, write him or her a letter, he or she will appreciate it.

For a happy and successful marriage do the little things that matter to your spouse, if it is remembering and celebrating occasions that make your spouse happy do it if is watching football with him or going for walks do it, if that makes him happy?

By so doing these little things it tells your spouse I don’t only love you, I care about you. Never too late to start doing these little things, now is a good time to start!

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